Wording Intentions: Asking For What You Really Want by Wendy Betterini
Have you ever asked the universe for something and gotten a result that wasn’t what you intended? When wording our intentions and speaking our desires, it pays to be very specific! Consider these examples:
Shannon wants to be debt-free, so she states an intention: “I want to pay off all my debt.” Suddenly she starts receiving demands for payment in full on loans she’s been paying in installments, or she receives notices about old debts she’s forgotten about.
Kim wants to meet the man of her dreams, so she states an intention: “I want to meet a man who is loyal, dedicated, loving, and handsome.” She meets him all right, but then finds out he’s already married to someone else. Or she meets a single man with those qualities, but he’s “loyal and dedicated” to his job and has little time for a social life.
Wanda wants to lose weight, so she states an intention: “I want to lose weight fast!” Within a few days, she comes down with a stomach flu that causes her to lose 10 pounds in a week.
Steve wants a new car, so he states that intention. Next thing you know, his current car breaks down and the repair shop says it can’t be fixed, or if it can, the cost would be equal to that of a new car. He has no choice but to buy a new car!
These types of situations have happened to me more times than I care to count, and I see them happening to others frequently too. However, if we learn to define our desires and state our intentions in very specific terms, our chances of receiving exactly what we want increases dramatically.
Be clear about what you don’t want: First, it helps to know fully what you DON’T want. That sounds simple enough, but often we don’t take the time to get clear about it, so we end up attracting stuff by default. One good way to know what you don’t want is to take a look at the circumstances of your life right now. Which situations cause you stress, grief, pain, or frustration? Make a list of the things you don’t want, so you can get clear about what you DO want.
What DO you want, anyway? Once we understand what we don’t want, we need to give some in-depth thought to what we do want. Most often, our “do wants” are the exact opposite of our “don’t wants.” If you don’t want financial lack, you do want financial abundance. If you don’t want tension in your relationships, you do want harmonious interactions with others. Everything that is on your “don’t want” list, write the opposite outcome in a list of “do wants.”
Defining the end result: More importantly than making a list of “wants” is understanding the true desire behind these things. We may say we want “a lot of money,” but why? Money by itself does nothing for us. If we look a little deeper, we find that we want a lot of money so we can enjoy financial freedom, travel, and luxury in our lives. Rather than focusing only on the acquisition of money, we should instead focus on inviting the DESIRED OUTCOMES into our lives. Yes, and an abundance of money too. We don’t have to remove money as a desire, but seeing it as the end-all, be-all of our desires is incredibly limiting.
Be specific: Here’s where you get to exercise your creativity! In order to be specific in wording our intentions, we first need to know what we don’t want, and what we do want, and the desired outcome we are trying to create. The first three steps listed above took us through that, but how do we word our intentions so they will attract what we really want?
Consider the difference between these two intentions:
1) I want a lot of money so I don’t have to work at a job I hate.
2) I want to do work that fills me with passion and joy and attracts massive amounts of money into my life, giving me the freedom to work when I want to, and not have to when I don’t want to.
See the difference? It’s all in the details. With every intention, we need to specify a “how” and a “why.” Occasionally we can add in a “when,” but remember that the universe has its own perfect timing that may or may not align with our ideas of when things should happen.
Acknowledge the blessings in disguise: Sometimes, no matter how specific we are with our words, our desires will manifest in a way we didn’t particularly want or expect. There are probably varied reasons for this, but the reasons don’t even matter. The important thing is to see these experiences as opportunities. Rather than sinking into frustration and despair when our intentions aren’t being fulfilled the way we expected, we can honor the process for what it is and affirm that it will all work out in the best way possible.
Usually, that’s exactly what will happen. Happy intending! 🙂